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Feature Poet – Elias Assefa


Don’t you hate wood-ticks?
Well I hate poli-Ticks
what a perfect little word
to describe the people diseasing the worldBRITAIN-G8-SUMMIT-CANADA-PRESSER
with their flapping little jaws,
they crawl beneath your skin
and suck the life out of society
its a sin!

They do it with their lies,
they wear their flashy ties
look you right in the eye
and cry!

If you don’t vote for them
the world will come to an end
for you and your friends!
and your families!

Won’t someone think of the children please!
Who have to live with the consequences of these policies!
But they have a mandate!
And don’t you just love their candidate?
He’s so charming and smooth, so proper and trim
handsome and slim,
he’s sure to win!

He even has that little cleft on his chin!
And the best thing
is that you can’t even see the strings
that make the puppet sing and dance
at the first chance
for those corporations who
by the way,
pay for the political advertisements that your seeing today.

And if those corporations happen to get their back scratched
and see ten times the scratch they fronted to pay for this hack come back?!

Well, that’s just the way of the world
and if your head is beginning to swirl son
the fun has just begun
cause if you’re looking for someone to blame
you can’t hate the player,
you gotta hate the game
and the admission to play is having no shame
be willing to turn on a dime for political gain
use your talking points
to win polling points
and pretend to be holier than a saint the Pope’s about to anoint

And some of these pricks
just don’t know when to quit

Not even when they’re caught red-handed
texting pictures of their dick!
Or when they’re hands are caught this far
from a freshly robbed cookie jar.

But what I really hate about these parliment hills
is that you always have to choose from amog the least of evils
so if you will allow me just one reprieve
a message to the Prime Minister

“FUCK You Steve!”

But because we’re Canadian,
en francias if i dare
“Monsieur Prime ministare
Menge moi merde”

Why did you write this poem?
I studied poli sci and wrote this piece during the 2012 elections, specifically the new york mayoral race when Anthony Weiner got caught sending a dick pic, but is also about how I feel about the topic in general.

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  • Karim Baaba

    Nicely done Elias!